October 12 - Zombody

Nobody ever asks what it's like to be dead.

The movies have certainly done us no favors.

People see me coming and start screaming and reaching for blunt objects. Honestly, it's like they already had a plan.

I've been shot, stabbed, clubbed and someone even took my hand off with a shovel.

And all that nonsense about eating brains. I mean .. yuck!

But ... your hand ...

Let's give our leading man a hand, shall we, kiddies?
Seriously, before he takes one of mine!

Mwahahahahahaa! *snort*

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty:

October 11 - The Twist of Madness

It was some days ago when I first encountered what I would come to know as the Twist of Madness.

I had seen the spiral before, of course.  For years I had studied its impossibly tight coils, and even when shown the technique firsthand, some essential truth of its construction had remained beyond my understanding.

Then I found that Facebook video so casually labelled, "Pip's Twirl & Curl Balloon Twisting Technique".

Disturbingly simple. Distressingly addictive.  Diabolically hard to perfect.  A twisting geometry that could only be described as non-Euclidean.

Suddenly I understood what no human mind was ever meant to comprehend.

I made another.  And another. 

My fingers are raw.  I think they've begun to change.  I haven't slept in days.  There are spirals everywhere.  I know now that I shall never be free of them.

May the gods forgive me, I have started another...

Sure seems like our resident twister ... Loves craftin', 
Round and round he goes, where the madness stops, nobody knows!

Mwahahahahahaa! *snort*

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty:

October 10 - The Very Very Hungry Caterpillar

The leaf settled its tummy, and the next day the caterpillar felt much better.

And it was still hungry.

So on Sunday, it ate one small bird - but it was still hungry.

On Monday, it ate two large squirrels - but it was still hungry.

On Tuesday, it ate three plump rabbits - but it was still hungry.

On Wednesday, it ate four grazing sheep - but it was still hungry.

On Friday, it followed the road up to the Johnsons' farmhouse.

And it was still hungry.

Unfortunately for the Johnsons, it looks like our little caterpillar has developed a taste for some ... home cooking.

Mwaheheeheheheee! *snort*

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty:

October 9 - Pumpkin Jim

Jim was a farmer. 

So it was perfectly reasonable when his head fell off to replace it with a pumpkin.

For a while, that worked just fine.  But there is a problem with carved pumpkins ... 

The rot started around his mouth.  His face drooped and his left eye began to leak something stringy that smelled like soup. Soon his skin had gone soft enough that his fingers would leave little impressions where he touched and he didn't dare brush away the fruit flies buzzing in and out of his nose. 

It was perfectly reasonable for him to carve another.

Looks like Jim's really using his gourd!
But I'm not quite sure he's thinking a-head!

Mwahahahahahaa! *snort*

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty:

October 8 - Mary Had a Lamb Obsession

Mary's college days drew near,
Full of cheer, but also tears,
To leave her lamb was Mary's fear

So she devised a plan.

She bought the last one on display,
A price to pay, so they say,
Then broke the wish stick right away,
And wished her lamb could come.

Then Father served some bread and jam,
Roasted ham, candied yam,
The main course was a little lamb,

Her father said was beef.

Something stumbled through the door,
Crossed the floor, angry roar,
Hooves and bones and nothing more -
Mary's wish had worked.

Poor Mary!  It looks like her wish has gone horribly .. right!
An obsession with a little lamb has turned family dinner into a bone-afide nightmare!

Mwahahahahahaa! *snort*

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty:

October 7 - The Murmurer

The Murmurer has the perfect lips for whispering.

It doesn’t need to be loud, it's barely a breath, just loud enough for you alone.

The voice is familiar. It doesn't demand - it just ... murmurs. 

Half-truths.  Little nudges of doubt.  Things you wondered before and thought you had settled.

That's its secret.

It doesn't need make you to believe.

It only needs you to listen.

[you know this isn't as good as others]

And there you have it, kiddies ...

The first addition to our dark menagerie.
The Murmurer may not look like much ...
but just wait until you hear what it has to say!

Mwahahahahahaaa! *snort*

[no one will ever read this]

[they are only being polite]

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty:

October 6 - Life of Max

... and then the Wild Thing, my fierce companion, the terrible one who kept me alive ... disappeared forever from my life.

After a few hours a member of my own species found me.  He left and returned with a group who carried me away.  I wept like a child, not because I was overwhelmed at having survived, although I was.  I was weeping because the Wild Thing left me ... so unceremoniously.  It broke my heart.

After all we had been through, he didn't even look back.   

But I have to believe that there was more in his eyes but my own reflection staring back at me.  I know it.  I felt it.  Even if I can't prove it.

You know I've left so much behind, my room, my little boat. I suppose in the end the whole of life becomes an act of letting go.  But what always hurts the most is not taking a moment to say goodbye.

I was never able to thank my mother.  To tell her without leaving the warm meal in my room, I would never have survived.  And I know the Wild Things are monsters, but I wish I had said "It's over.  We survived.  Thank you for saving my life.  I love you."

A boy, a boat, a monster and some existential trauma... 
This story has everything but mathematics!
So tonight we'll be severing dessert with a slice of Pi!
Mwahahahahahaa! *snort*

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty: