October 14 - Charon

Do you have any idea how long we've tried to raise that fare?  It's just that ancient pacts are notoriously difficult to renegotiate.

Then in 2025, a handful of wealthy men who hadn't touched a penny in decades decided to stop making them.   They convinced an entire nation that minting its own pennies had simply become too expensive.

A remarkable achievement, really - there wasn't even a vote. Fifty-six million dollars freed up for some sort of big, beautiful budget.  

And just like that, the ancient pact was broken.

My fare rose to a nickel.

I've already put a deposit on a luxury 26-foot pontoon with a 200-horsepower Mercury and reclining captain's chair. I'm calling her The Trickle Down.

Ahhh, fiscal responsibility!
Saving pennies for the living while nickel-and-diming the dead!
It's enough to make you want to roll over in your grave
... to look for loose change!

Mwahahahahahaa! *snort*

(view other David Brenion inspired balloons!)

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty:

October 13 - Balloodoo

October 13th.

My experiments have thus far failed to substantiate any of the natives' more extravagant claims.

They insist that the figure must never be inflated by its maker, but this is plainly another of their silly superstitions. Mine has remained beside my bed for three nights without incident.

In the meanwhile, though - I have developed a rather stubborn sinus infection.  The pressure is quite extraordinary, but I expect the antibiotics will take effect shortly.  I trust my next report will find me in better health.

Ah, Balloodoo! A little-known branch of voodoo.
It's positively breathtaking!

Mwaheheeheheheee! *snort*

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty:

October 12 - Zombody

Nobody ever asks what it's like to be dead.

The movies have certainly done us no favors.

People see me coming and start screaming and reaching for blunt objects. Honestly, it's like they already had a plan.

I've been shot, stabbed, clubbed and someone even took my hand off with a shovel.

And all that nonsense about eating brains. I mean .. yuck!

But ... your hand ...

Let's give our leading man a hand, shall we, kiddies?
Seriously, before he takes one of mine!

Mwahahahahahaa! *snort*

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty:

October 11 - The Twist of Madness

It was some days ago when I first encountered what I would come to know as the Twist of Madness.

I had seen the spiral before, of course.  For years I had studied its impossibly tight coils, and even when shown the technique firsthand, some essential truth of its construction had remained beyond my understanding.

Then I found that Facebook video so casually labelled, "Pip's Twirl & Curl Balloon Twisting Technique".

Disturbingly simple. Distressingly addictive.  Diabolically hard to perfect.  A twisting geometry that could only be described as non-Euclidean.

Suddenly I understood what no human mind was ever meant to comprehend.

I made another.  And another. 

My fingers are raw.  I think they've begun to change.  I haven't slept in days.  There are spirals everywhere.  I know now that I shall never be free of them.

May the gods forgive me, I have started another...

Sure seems like our resident twister ... Loves craftin', 
Round and round he goes, where the madness stops, nobody knows!

Mwahahahahahaa! *snort*

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty:

October 10 - The Very Very Hungry Caterpillar

The leaf settled its tummy, and the next day the caterpillar felt much better.

And it was still hungry.

So on Sunday, it ate one small bird - but it was still hungry.

On Monday, it ate two large squirrels - but it was still hungry.

On Tuesday, it ate three plump rabbits - but it was still hungry.

On Wednesday, it ate four grazing sheep - but it was still hungry.

On Friday, it followed the road up to the Johnsons' farmhouse.

And it was still hungry.

Unfortunately for the Johnsons, it looks like our little caterpillar has developed a taste for some ... home cooking.

Mwaheheeheheheee! *snort*

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty:

October 9 - Pumpkin Jim

Jim was a farmer. 

So it was perfectly reasonable when his head fell off to replace it with a pumpkin.

For a while, that worked just fine.  But there is a problem with carved pumpkins ... 

The rot started around his mouth.  His face drooped and his left eye began to leak something stringy that smelled like soup. Soon his skin had gone soft enough that his fingers would leave little impressions where he touched and he didn't dare brush away the fruit flies buzzing in and out of his nose. 

It was perfectly reasonable for him to carve another.

Looks like Jim's really using his gourd!
But I'm not quite sure he's thinking a-head!

Mwahahahahahaa! *snort*

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty:

October 8 - Mary Had a Lamb Obsession

Mary's college days drew near,
Full of cheer, but also tears,
To leave her lamb was Mary's fear

So she devised a plan.

She bought the last one on display,
A price to pay, so they say,
Then broke the wish stick right away,
And wished her lamb could come.

Then Father served some bread and jam,
Roasted ham, candied yam,
The main course was a little lamb,

Her father said was beef.

Something stumbled through the door,
Crossed the floor, angry roar,
Hooves and bones and nothing more -
Mary's wish had worked.

Poor Mary!  It looks like her wish has gone horribly .. right!
An obsession with a little lamb has turned family dinner into a bone-afide nightmare!

Mwahahahahahaa! *snort*

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Tales from the Other Other Side of the Sty: